Life, has been pissing me off endlessly for quite some time alr.

Stress? No, I dont think so that's the reason. I think given anyone whom face so much pressure from everywhere, everyside and everybody for like almost since you are up til you sleep is enough to make that person flip!

Seriously, i am sick of those
jin hui here.... jin hui there.....
jinhui THIS
jinhui THAT

and when i DO NOT comply. I am deemed as ATTITUDE, UNHELPFUL, IMPATIENT, SELF-CENTERED.

EVERY SINGLE DAY, i get ppl coming to me not knowing what they want and actually think that I can give them WHATEVER they want. What's worse? These ppl got NO basic manners, dont their mother even teach them when you ASK for something, even if you dont say the word 'PLEASE' at least keep your tone of your voice acceptable. As you talk to these ppl everyday, as long as these ppl speaks with a normal tone alr very happy liao.

Like today, i dun really mind if i get rubbish from external sources, but what bout ppl from internal of the organisation?! this stupid woman does the same thing as me, after looking at her photo, i can conclude that she had been working for at least 8 years. This means that she is a lot more experience than me right?! NO!!! She gave such unclear and un-detailed information for such a simple and universal question and expects me to know what she wants? And this dumb person had the cheek to say, 'As I already told you jus now, so can u help me check?!?!!?!' She said it all in a sibeh rude and impatient way. And in the end, when I finally talk to the taxpayer myself, I settled it in like 3 mins???? And the question asked was really really just standard procedues that any temp staff can answer lor.

No wonder work so long liao still SAME POSITION AS ME. *shakes head*

When everyone expect you to be a 'yes-man', when at times you say the word 'no' they come chasing you with a knife and refuse to let you, and til the extend of breathing down your neck and leaving u no room to even BREATHE. I dont get it, I m not someone understanding, or neither am i capable of reading a person's mind. Or I am also not someone who will constantly think of how others are feeling, blah blah .. I cant do all that, its just not me to be so detailed and patient and careful.

As I think back, over the years, my expectations of things changed so drastically that I really do not know whether I am just trying to bend myself to fit in with the expectations ppl want from me.

but hey, why shld i be the one bending myself, i wonder sometimes. These years, i keep trying to live up to expectations but almost all the time when the situation is the other way round, I keep getting disappointed instead.

those above are not just work, they are just things from everywhere that are all bottled in for a long long long long time and i had never let them out before.


i dont know, i m really tired of ppl demanding this and that from me. I know for work its like that, but these are matters over a super long time and I never found a chance or way to say them out. Sometimes I jus feels like retreating back into my shell and ignore the world, and maybe doing things i want or jus seeing the ppl that i wanna see.

Thinking back from square one, i dont see the point of me getting upset at ppl whom are upset at me, actually i dont really care at all.........